Operation Empire

This is obviously my personal site but my online content arsenal is vast. It includes Greater Gotham: Going Global, a blog about being out and about in New York City and what happens when you turn Gotham Girl lose on the UK; Fabulous Foodie, where food and food culture are served up a la carte. Last but not least, there is Modern Parlance -- home to my hard-working writer alter ego and headquarters in my nefarious plan to take over the world. It is also home to my work blog - Personal Parlance, where I hold forth on publishing, books, social media, communication, indexing, writing, education and anything else content-wise that catches my eye. 

I had wanted to call the whole thing Operation Empire but several of my friends suggested that might put people off. Upon consideration I decided that a) they were right (so went with Modern Parlance) and b) to effectively take over the world, I would need fewer friends and more minions. Applications being accepted now.

Scribbles & Notes

Of course, the word-smithing started long before the plan for world domination. At one time or another, my personal writing projects have included:

Take 2 Movie Reviews which proved indirectly that I once had a social life where as TV Rants & Raves suggested perhaps that I didn't. (I take comfort in the fact that I haven't updated it lately - which suggests that things are looking up.)

The only thing my ongoing Bibliomania ever suggested was that I needed more shelves and the patience to wait for  paperbacks. Publishing Grunt's Bible came about because working with books isn't the thrill ride that reading or buying them is. 

There were pure flights of fancy like Staving off Ennui, the Server Sees the Sights; there were answers to hypothetical questions like "what should go in a toy hall of fame and then there were the snarkathons - first site website I ever did - Alias Smith & Jones Site and the Dark Shadows Snarkathon.

Much older material is kept in the Ephemera Archives - moved to the backburner but not completely forgotten. Who knows what'll end up catching my attention next...

   The Server Sees the Sights 

Almost the minute it got to the office, the server started pleading to see the sites of the "Capital of the World". Apparently it had been a long time dream of this small (well, not so tiny as we had originally thought it would be) server to come to the Big Apple.

Finally, its hosts gave in and David - who sits closest to it, after all - was selected to be the tour guide. We see them here, deeply involved in negotiations for the city-wide jaunt. David wanted to stick to cabs, while the server insisted on the subway - to get the real flavor of New York. David wanted to be back by six so he could catch his train. The server scoffed (or maybe it was a power surge) at the very thought. Wasn't this, after all, the city that never sleeps? Ke started to agree that the server had a point but a look from Rick (and an elbow jab from Leslie) changed his mind.

David and the server left just after 10:00a.m. By 2:30p.m. they hadn't called in and Rick couldn't get David on his cell phone. As a result, it was decided that Rob would be sent out to look for them. Rick Whelan noticed that despite the fact that the site-seeing pair had headed west towards the park, Rob went east towards Bloomingdale's...and the restaurant where his girlfriend worked. Rick chose to keep that observation to himself. The server's Sinatra imitation had disturbed him greatly and he wasn't in a hurry to see the little gray box again that day.

Before David could lead the way to the Central Park Zoo, the server spotted the Plaza Hotel and, with a series of excited beeps and whirs, hurried towards the New York City landmark. David thought things might be looking up. Wasn't the server heading towards the long time home of the Oak Room? If he could manage to get a few drinks into the server, he might get it back to the office early.

Alas, it was not to be.

The server did, indeed, head towards the Oak Room - initially. But as David rounded the corner (he fallen a bit behind since he was walking and the server was rolling), he saw the server stopped in the middle of the hall, staring...well, OK, facing as if staring...at the picture of Eloise, the little girl of storybook fame who lived in the Plaza.

Yes, the server was a closet Eloise fan and it took all of David's patience and fortitude to get the server out of the building before the little machine could commence "searching" for it's literary heroine.

Shortly after David had left with the server, Deborah started to worry. Not so much about David - who, after all had already turned in his time sheet and was thus accounted for - but about the server. This tour of the server's was not on the project plan and she wasn't entirely convinced that it was covered by any of the current job descriptions. This tour of NYC was completely out of scope!

When she expressed her concerns about scope-creep to Rick 1 and Rick 2 , they agreed that David and the server should be found and brought back until an estimate could be done for the tour. Rick 1 went north, Rick 2 went south and Deborah went west.

She hadn't been looking for long when she spotted a familiar, gray, square shape, posing for pictures in front of the NBC entrance.  When she explained to the truants that they'd have to go back immediately, the server launched into a surprisingly eloquent plea for mercy (and "just one more hour"). Deborah held a hurried consultation with David and she agreed to pretend she hadn't seen them -- in return for David's help with her computer. The server was so thankful it volunteered to help with her computer as well.

When the server saw that David was occupied with the purchase of the pretzel, it made a brave (some might say fool hardy) decision. Bidding new friends and admirers adieu, the server rolled as fast as it could towards the subway.

Prevailing on the famed kindness New Yorkers exhibit to strangers, he got himself down the stairs and into the train. As the subway pulled out, the server could see David (pretzel in hand) sprinting into the station. The last thing the server saw as the train left the platform was David's graceful but doomed attempt to jump the turnstiles.


Tune in for more adventures with the Server next time wherein:

There is a trip to Brooklyn - wherein the server serenades strollers on the promenade to his rendition of "Welcome Back" from Welcome Back, Kotter

Then, after a narrow escape on Wall Street, the server pauses and in a rare solemn moment contemplating the question that burns in the minds (and hard drives) of beings everywhere - Who is buried in Grant's Tomb?

What do I do when not working on this site, read a bit about the guilty party responsible for this site or the answers I gave to the 'about me' survey
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